A Guide to Choosing a Therapist

Deciding to begin a course of therapy can be a lengthy process - admitting that things aren't quite right isn't always easy, and neither is committing to doing something about it! But when you've finally got to that point you suddenly have a whole new problem to face: How do you know which therapist is the right therapist for you?

The first thing to look out for is someone who is qualified. Don't assume that just because somebody calls themselves a counsellor or a hypnotherapist they must have the relevant qualifications - unfortunately there are some unscrupulous types about who will assume the title without gaining the foundation knowledge and accreditation first. Most therapists will state their qualifications on their website or literature (they'll have worked hard to achieve them so will be proud to show them off!), but if not don't be afraid to ask. If everything is above board they won't mind being asked and will be happy to fill you in. 

Similarly, make sure that you find a therapist who is a member of a professional body, for example the BACP for counsellors, or the General Hypnotherapy Register for hypnotherapists. This means that your therapist will abide by a strict code of professional conduct, and that, in the unlikely event that you should have a complaint about your therapist, you will have someone to complain to! 

These websites can be a good place to start looking for a therapist in fact, you can search the BACP for suitable counsellors here, and the General Hypnotherapy Register here. Any therapist who is a member of their professional body should also have professional insurance, another must-have, as this provides more protection for you, the client. 

Next, read through some websites and social media profiles. This will give you a feel for who the therapist is, their area(s) of expertise and their approach to therapy. Don't get too drawn in by flashy websites - look for substance over style! I tend to prefer an upfront approach to stating fees so like to be able to find that on the website, a reasonable price shouldn't need to be kept quiet to draw you in. From this you can make a short list of the therapists you feel are most likely to suit you at this point.

Most therapists will offer the chance to speak with them either in person, or over the phone, and should not charge for this. Now you can begin contacting the therapists on your short list, and ask to book your free consultation. A therapist should never make you feel pressured into booking a paid for session. It's completely acceptable to say that you are taking your time in finding the right therapist for you, and that you will contact them again when you have made your decision. Do let them know even if you've decided against working with them, though, it's polite and doesn't require more than a quick email.

When you speak to, or meet with, a therapist you should be able to get a feel of whether you will want to work with them or not. Don't discount your gut instinct on this, and don't feel bad about crossing someone off your list because "something just didn't feel right". Some people just don't gel, it's not a reflection on you or on them, and you need to feel completely comfortable with your therapist. 

If you can't find a therapist in your local area who you feel is just right, don't despair! Many therapists offer online therapy, via Skype or even over the phone, which means that you can access their services from anywhere in the world. This can be a real lifeline if you have mobility issues, a lack of childcare, or just want to save some time and money on travelling. 

Choosing a therapist can seem like a daunting task, so I hope I've made the process a little simpler.

I'd love to hear from you, if you've got any comments or questions you can post them below or message me privately on lily@lilycameronhypnotherapy.com

3 Reasons Why You Should Try Hypnotherapy

An article I wrote for MindBodyGreen:

3 reasons why you should try hypnotherapy.

Three Steps to Stop Smoking - For Good!

We all know that smoking isn't good for you, it's hard not to, with billboards showing gory images of blocked arteries, and cancerous lungs, and stark warnings on every cigarette packet. We know it harms your lungs, your heart, your skin, we know it makes you smell, stains your teeth and nails, and costs a fortune. And yet many UK adults - 1 in 5, according to Cancer Research UK- still do it. Why?

Most smokers began as teenagers, maybe fitting in with friends, as an act of rebellion, or as a result of seeing parents smoke. As they grow older (and, perhaps, wiser!) many will reach a point where they want to stop, however by this point the habit has been formed, and they can find themselves struggling.

Nicotine is a highly addictive drug, and cigarette manufacturers have been accused of using additives to make cigarettes even more addictive. Besides the physical addiction, habits and rituals form around smoking, which can be difficult to break. Perhaps you like to have a cigarette on your coffee break at work, or after a meal. Some cite socialising, especially when alcohol is involved, as their main trigger to smoke. Most smokers will say that smoking helps them to de-stress.

The good news is that nicotine, whilst definitely addictive, is pretty short lived. 48 hours after your last cigarette there will be NO nicotine remaining in your body, so you are no longer physically addicted to smoking. Congratulations! You've done the hard part and it only took two days! All that's left now is to break the habit. This can be a stumbling block for many would-be quitters, and while there are any number of nicotine replacement products on the market, no-one has yet invented one that mimics those rituals that become a part of someone's daily life.

So how does anyone manage to quit? Follow these three steps, and you'll be well on your way!

1. Think of a really good reason

Despite knowing the health risks, many people find it difficult to quit for that reason alone - we tend to see ourselves as invincible, more so the younger we are, and just don't truly believe that lung cancer or heart disease could ever happen to us. If this sounds like you then look around you and figure out your own personal priorities.

If you're a parent you'll know that children learn from what they see us do, not from what we say, so telling your children not to smoke while being a smoker yourself is unlikely to have much impact. So your priority may be to be a strong role model for your kids. Or maybe you worry that you won't be around to see them grow up, or to play with your grandchildren.

Maybe you've noticed those tell tale wrinkles begin to appear around your mouth, and want to give your skin a better chance of staying healthy and smooth. Perhaps you're the last in your social group to quit, and are sick of huddling outside the pub or restaurant while everyone else socialises in the warmth.

Maybe you're noticing the strain on your wallet and have had enough of literally burning your hard earned cash, you'd like to spend it on something a little more enjoyable.

Your reasons are personal, but whatever they are, they are worth quitting for, for good! When you've identified your reasons for stopping make sure you write them down, this helps to cement your intention and reinforce to yourself why you're doing this.

2. Shake up your Routine

So you've identified your excellent reasons for giving up, you've written them down and stuck them on your fridge (and in your handbag, and wallet, and on the dashboard of your car, and your bathroom mirror) and you've marked a big red X on the calendar - your first day of being smoke free for life. 

They say that proper planning prevents poor performance, and quitting smoking is no exception. Now is the time to begin your preparation for quitting, and breaking those little rituals and habits is a great place to start. Did you always have a cigarette with your morning coffee? Wait and have it half an hour later instead. You'll enjoy the taste of your coffee more, and won't have to contend with the association of "coffee = cigarette" when you give up. Did you have a favourite bench to sit on and smoke outside work, maybe with a great view, or a warm sunny spot? Have your cigarette round the corner instead (by the bins, or in that chilly alcove, somewhere it's not particularly pleasant to be!), then you can enjoy your lovely view with some fresh air. Did you stay loyal to a particular brand for years? Choose a different one, switch from ready made to rolling tobacco, or vice versa, anything to begin to break that familiar routine. 

3. Ask for Help!

Look at the most successful people you can think of. Steve Jobs, Richard Branson, Stephen Hawkings, Beyonce, none of these people got to where they did by themselves. Sure, nowadays they have hordes of employees, but in the early days they asked for help, they called in favours, they let people know that they needed support. If they all needed help, why would you be any different?

Some people say they don't want to let people know they're planning to quit in case they fail and lose face. I say those people are planning to fail! Assume you will quit, after all, you have your great reasons, you've put the work in to prepare yourself, so why wouldn't you succeed? Maybe you've tried before and ended up smoking again. That was then, this is now - forget about the past and focus on your smoke free future! Tell EVERYONE.

Maybe your partner is a non-smoker and has wanted you to give up for ages, or perhaps they haven't chosen to become a non-smoker yet, but are supportive of your quitting. Whatever your situation, let them know what you need from them. That might be gentle reminders, or acknowledgements of your success, or perhaps you just need to know you can talk to them if you want to. Be open, and don't expect them to be mind readers.

Ask your friends to be supportive. If they can't do this - and it can be difficult if they still smoke, your quitting highlights what they perhaps feel they should be doing - then ask them to respect what you're doing and just avoid the subject. Your true friends will do this, and you might just inspire them to give up too!

Professional help can be invaluable in achieving your goal. Try to do it with willpower alone and your chances of success are low, according to New Scientist hypnotherapy is the most effective method of quitting. Hypnotherapy works with your subconcious to change your thought processes, and break those old associations and habits for good, unlike willpower which doesn't address the underlying cause, or nicotine replacement which simply ensures that you continue to be physically addicted to a drug. 

11th March 2015 is National No Smoking Day. Why not join the other proud quitters and make this year the one you finally give up? 

Book onto my two session Stop Smoking course before March 11th 2015 and receive a 50% discount! 

I'd love to hear from you, if you've got any comments or questions you can post them below or message me privately on lily@lilycameronhypnotherapy.com